NO THANKS. WE'LL PASS.

No exaggeration, I've probably clicked on over 4,500 Zillow house-for-sale dots so far and I've seen some real doozies! Since we still have no idea where we will eventually land, I decided to just have a little fun and start saving some of the worst of the worst that I've come across through my searches.

So here goes.

 

Quite the sales pitch...

 

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Nothing says relaxing like the sterile, institutional, no windows, brown spa look.

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"Completely renovated with old style charm! Beautiful farmhouse on 2+ acres... better hurry!"

This realtor should either lose his license or get an award for most creative description that does not match the house.

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Back when roads were named literally.

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Won't live on this road, no matter how amazing the house might be!

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When you get one photo as your opening thumbnail image to entice buyers, and you choose this one.

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It actually has potential but looks so sad. All of its curb appeal must be in the back.

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Rock garden and no trees. When you want really, really, really low maintanance.

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This is just really sad.

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Bigger is not better! Well unless this room is also used for afternoon dance recitals.

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You are allowed to use this courtyard for one hour a day if you're on good behavior.

(Too bad this house was not on Prison Camp Rd.)

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I especially love this furniture staging and how the sofa is aimed at the front door.

Perfect if you have teenagers who come home late, so you can sit in the dark and say in a low voice, "I've been waiting for you."

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All of your boxy, symmetrical dreams realized

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"The current owner stripped the interior down to the studs for a complete remodel."

Well that was nice of him.

I also love that this house is in a town called North Dinwiddie.

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A contractor drew up these house plans AND someone said, looks great, let's build it!

What is happening here!?

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The End.

(for now)